The Top 10 E-mail Courtesy Suggestions

Originally Submitted on 3/22/2000.

For most people e-mail seems to be both blessing and curse. It enables low-cost contact with folks we would rarely write to, and it allows us to be inundated with spam. We can do little about the spammers except consistently report them. In our more individual
correspondence, however, we can maintain the courtesies that keep relationships smooth and our brows unfurrowed.

1. Reformat your forwards.

If a message is worth forwarding to half the rest of the
world, then it is worth the few moments it takes to remove
the >>> with a word processing function.

2. Change the subject line when the topic has changed.

Often, after several exchanges of e-mail, the topic has moved from the original subject, yet the subject line remains the same. It is easier to keep track of incoming mail if the subject line has been changed to reflect whatever it is you are now writing about.

3. Cut off trailing previous messages.

Many e-mail programs automatically include the message to which you are replying. But if that was a reply, then your previous message trails below it, and below it is the previous message, and so on.... Erasing all but the last message is usually reasonable.

4. Resist chain letters.

Do you feel pressure and irritation when someone sends you an inspiring or humorous message that is followed by demand that you forward it to ten friends immediately or... something dire will befall you? So why would you inflect that same feeling of pressure and irritation on ten of your friends? The delete key is ready and waiting to fulfill its function.

5. Respect other people's privacy.

That includes their e-mail address. When sending the same e-mail to a bunch of friends/relatives who may come from different circles and not know each other, consider using the blind copy function so that you do not share all your friends' e-mail addresses with everyone you are sending to. Or be prepared to get blamed if they start receiving spam.

6. Don't spam.

This seems obvious, but some people don't realize that if they take all the addresses they receive in forwarded mail, and use them for their own purposes without permission, this is still a form of spam. If you do this and someone reports you then you can lose your ISP privileges.

7. Do not shout.

Using all caps is the internet equivalent of shouting, and is likely to be interpreted as indicating that you either are a very unsophisticated internet user or that you are outright discourteous.

8. Do not flame, over-react, or erase too quickly and without sufficient thought.

In handwriting a response to something that makes us angry we have time to ponder our words, crumple and discard several versions, and in general think things through. The advantage of e-mail's speed is also its pitfall. If you find yourself feeling ANY strong emotion as
you compose a hasty response to something you have read it is wise to save it in the Draft file and leave it there for at least a day before sending it. Many friendships have been lost by too much haste and too little thought before sending an e-mail message.

9. Be patient when expecting a reply.

Accept that some people have lives other than the internet and may not respond immediately. Some people only check their e-mail once a week. (Yes, really!)

10. Recognize that not everyone wants to receive everything that you find funny.

Do not continue to send stuff if they never acknowledge, thank you, or reciprocate.

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