Coaching Tip: Triangulation in the work place
Category: Coaching Secrets (CS189)Originally Submitted on 10/31/99.
Introduction
A great many workplace difficulties reported by clients relate, when examined, to triangulation. For example, perhaps colleague A talks to supervisor B, supervisor B talks to client C, perhaps client C also talks to colleague A, but the three never talk together in the same room or in the same conversation. As a result, the message that each receives from the others is subtly different, leading to miscommunication and accompanying misunderstanding and distress.
The Coaching Tip
Such miscommunication may not be deliberate (although, of course, it may be). Many people who pride themselves in communicating well with individuals do not realize how much they tailor what they say to that individual, and so may unknowingly change the message as they switch communication styles from one person to another.It frequently becomes advisable to urge clients to speak directly to anyone whose communications they are hearing about indirectly. It is also advisable that they try to get the various people into the same room so that the same message may be heard by all.
Resistance to this fairly simple procedure may indicate several issues:
1. The client may feel so unempowered as to be unable to take steps for change.
2. The resistance may come from someone who has difficulty in dealing with confrontation in any form, and who habitually avoids it by triangulation rather than by having folks with different points of view negotiate directly. This may be the client or someone else in the mix.
3. The resistance may come from the person who is doing the misinformation, in which case it seems that this misinformation
is conscious and deliberate.Before discussing appropriate strategies, the coach and client should consider each of these possibilities, and any others that arise. From there, the direction of the coaching will vary according to which seems to be the most accurate assessment of the situation.
About the Submitter
This piece was originally submitted by Diana Robinson, Ph.D., Personal Development Coach, who can be reached at Diana@ChoiceCoach.com, or visited on the web. Diana Robinson wants you to know: To learn more about my Personal Development Coaching and/or to subscribe to either/both of my two e-mail free newsletters, please visit my web site. I also offer you the gift of a half-hour of free coaching by phone, with no obligation.
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