Coaching Tip: Clients make their own decisions.
Category: Coaching Secrets (CS409)Originally Submitted on 6/21/2002.
Introduction
If one stays with the spirit of coaching transparently, avoiding any agenda except that of the client, and encouraging the client to do the decision making, it is not likely that even the most inexperienced of coaches will do harm in their coaching.
The Coaching Tip
Beginning coaches, while eager to start coaching, are often over-awed by what they see as the responsibility of coaching someone else. Fear of making a mistake has held many a new coach back from seeking clients. "What if I mess up someone's life?" a new coach once asked me.If we are truly coaching, we will remain transparent, help our clients to focus on their own agendas, and ask the questions that will bring them to their own insights, choices, and decisions. Therefore, the possibility of 'messing up someone else's life' is almost nonexistent.***
You as a coach may widen the horizon, may spread open a map of previously undreamed of possibilities and choices before the client, but you will not be making the decisions for them, or even pushing them towards any particular decision. It is the client who must choose the path to be taken.
Just to be sure, when decision-making is going on during a coaching session, it is always wise to reiterate that these decisions must be the client's. It may be useful to ask questions that emphasize this, along the lines of "Does this feel like a good fit for you?" "Are you truly comfortable that this is the right decision for you?" Then YOU can feel comfortable that it is not you who is deciding, and that the client is truly responsible.
** This does not mean that we may not annoy a client and get fired occasionally. That is a different issue, and not the end of the world.
About the Submitter
This piece was originally submitted by Diana Robinson, PhD., PCC, CCG, Personal Effectiveness Coach, who can be reached at Diana@ChoiceCoach.com, or visited on the web. Diana Robinson wants you to know: I hope you will accept my offer of a free half-hour coaching call and/or free e-zines. Let's discover how you can best move forward toward your chosen goals. Please visit me at www.ChoiceCoach.com.
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